Getting back in the swing

Like telling your kid to keep pumping their legs to keep a playground swing going, a good writer needs to keep their swing going and therefore needs to keep pumping out new works of writing. Rather that be working on short stories, novels or just simply a blog. Writing is something you can so easily get rusty at. If you’re a writer you already know that ideas flow constantly, sometimes less frequently but nonetheless, the mind of a writer is always pumping along.

For a long while now life has been too busy and a bit stressing to focus on writing. I look at Facebook memories where I posted on being hard at work on prepping A Killer’s Saga for publication and I thought God I miss writing. I used to press myself so hard to get the ideas on the page or even with editing. I haven’t worked on any writing for quite some time and that actually makes me feel bad.

So it’s time to pick myself up and get back on the writing horse. At the moment I’m pumping myself up to get back to work and it’s my hope to at least lay down a few good chapters and perhaps even do some editing today.

Love to those who follow me and I’ll leave a link on where to find my self published works.

Urge to write but…

Have you ever had a strong urge to write but then not know what to write, or where to start? I’ve been there. I love writing. I’m perhaps a bit too creative. At 39, I find the urge to create feels stronger than it ever did when I was in my twenties. I love making bead jewelry and drawing trees and other fantasy art. And as of late I find I spend hours on something creative. But for a long while now my urge to write is there but its as if my slate is blank. Sure, I’m blogging and that’s awesome and also is good practice for writing. However it also hit me, I should be working on my novels, or a short story, or something like that. Because I’ve left writing on the back burner for a little too long.

Slowly but steadily I am also getting back to writing. I did write an article recently for an online magazine. And that was a good step to continuing my passion. I also have found I like editing. Not just my work but others’ work as well. But of course, English was always my fave subject in school and I did well with it, so I suppose no surprise I would like to write as well as edit.

So I feel my advice is to basically find some form of writing when you feel you’ve gotten off track. Though you could also do some reading. Reading as we all know helps to make you a better writer.

I hope you’ve enjoyed this post and my blog and that it’s helpful to my readers.

Writing attraction and reactions in Erotica and what makes it “work”

What I feel is a number one thing that makes erotica work is definitely take from your own human emotions. What draws you to another person sexually? How do you feel when attracted to someone? Does your heart beat faster? Of course it does. And not necessarily because of a love type emotion. But because something about them attracted you and your body reacts in many ways. Subtle reactions occur as well. When I’m attracted to someone I tend to grin and feel excited as well.  All of the emotions and reactions can be written easier than it seems.  {Sally brushed the hair away from her eyes. This was a nervous habit of hers when around a hot guy.  She shyly looked him up and down and grinned.  Her mind went everywhere from wondering how he looked nude, to how the caress of his hand on her cheek would feel and her heart began to quicken with each thought.  She felt naughty but in a delicious way.  She wasn’t the bold type and therefore just lusting him openly she was sure her cheeks were flush, they sure felt fire hot.}

While that’s a very short example I could go on and on, I’ve always been a very talkative and with writing, wordy, person. But my main idea to convey is that you can express attraction in many ways. And that while you can bring it out from your imagination of how your character would react, if you’re new to writing or looking to sharpen skills, work from how you, yourself react when attracted to someone.  You can never fail with true emotion and experiences.  The example piece above comes from a bit of me. As a high school student and even before then I was shy and felt awkward around guys.

However I do feel you can realistically write emotions and reactions that are wildly different and that you have to put imagination into.  Let’s use my example again but change it up for Sally to be more bold and open.  {Sally flipped her hair off her shoulder. She was feeling flirty today and it showed even in how she dressed.  The white button down shirt she wore was unbuttoned and unabashedly showing her cleavage.  The lace of her bra peeking out.  She brushed a hand across the mini skirt that barely covered her ass cheeks and grinned at how naughty she felt and how being naughty was nothing new to this girl.  She looked Brady over head to toe as he installed new windows in her apartment.  She ached to know how he looked out of his shirt, how those muscles she could see, would feel pressed against her breasts.  She was dying to unzip his jeans and put her hands on him.  Just the thought of doing such things to Brady made her flush, and heat in her cheeks wasn’t the only thing hot and bothered about her.  She wanted him badly and wondered if he knew it even as she eyed his hot ass longingly.}

In my second example our Sally becomes a wanton, lustful girl, the type you could see not being afraid to go after Brady.  And I feel while I show some of the same signs of attraction in both examples, you can easily see a drastic change in how she portrays that attraction.  Our first Sally shyly examines him while having heated thoughts and reactions. But everything about her isn’t shy {She felt naughty but in a delicious way.} This simple sentence shows she could easily come out of that shell and still go after what she wants.  Our second Sally reacts in a manner that makes the reader assume Brady will be in her bed before the windows are finished.

I feel good erotica should make you at least assume what’s coming next just by how the character reacts.  I also feel that it doesn’t need to be spoken word to get across the point of longing and desire.  The hardest part is probably describing things we wouldn’t know normally unless we could read the person’s mind or somehow see the attraction. Another good trick is other small reactions such as licking your lips, or biting your bottom lip.  Little habits we have as humans that show lust and longing.

This may seem like I’m going off topic, but with our first Sally (if this was an actual piece I was writing…) the next scene you might find she throws Brady to the couch and starts kissing him feverishly and then cut to Brady’s voice saying something like “I need to get the bedroom windows from my truck.”  snaps her from what we come to realize is our shy Sally fantasizing being bold enough to have her way with him. And I could go on with written subtle hints of attraction I used as examples like: Sally bit her lip as she quickly stole a glance to his ass while he walked out the door but knew she needed the space from him even momentarily.


Another way of showing attraction is through a mix of spoken words, emotions and reactions.  I’ll use our bold Sally for this example.

{Sally bit her bottom lip when Brady turned to her now and said something about going out to his truck.  She had to admit she hadn’t realized what he was saying more than the part about his truck.  Her tone was softer than normal with a hint of phone sex operator as she replied.  “Mmm will you be working on the bedroom today?”  she felt she sounded silly asking that but it was too late now.  He laughed and with a for the second time type of tone, he said, “Yes, I’m going to get the bedroom windows now.”  Sally wasn’t sure why she moaned her words when around him but she was well aware she did this.  Even saying the simplest things and for any man who had known her intimately knew when she was aroused, or horny even.  She watched as Brady returned and made his way to her bedroom.  She couldn’t help but to look at his muscular arms as he carried the windows in, and admired his tattoos.  From the kitchen she called out to him “Would you like some tea?”  Even while asking him something so innocent her mind was elsewhere.  She thought of running ice down his broad chest and licking drops of water from him.  And although she hadn’t meant to, a moan escaped her now.}

I could also easily write this same scene with our shy Sally. And for the changes I would most likely make her nervous asking him things. Her tone would convey a woman who feels more insecure asking him anything.  She might even stammer some words, or say “um or uh” before saying would you like some tea? I might make her aware of how she is behaving but feel bashful that she’s behaving this way.  And if I had shy Sally moan I may even go a little dramatic and make her try to cover why she “moaned.”  But with either Sally it would be more than obvious she wants Brady.

What I feel makes it work, with either version of Sally is another point I’ll make. Rather Sally is boldly attracted to him and unafraid to show it, or shy reserved and worried he’ll know, I would write her unafraid of feeling and reacting to her attraction to Brady.  I feel it’s very normal to make your female character feel just as lustfully attracted to a man as a man would be to her.  Just because we typically view guys as the ones who would be staring at the woman’s ass or imagining getting her in his bed, doesn’t mean our female characters cannot feel just as sexual even if in a shy more tamed approach I still show Sally having very bold thoughts and feelings. Our shy Sally still longs to know what Brady looks like nude, imagines she could throw him to the couch and make out with him.

Making it work is a matter of making the reader feel as hot and bothered as Sally does.  Making them feel awkward as shy Sally but still knowing she would like to make love with him.  And while it’s very acceptable to write attraction as the female or male having arousal type reactions I wanted to show  a range of ways you can also express other ways people react. It can be done in stages this way as well. From a small escaped moan, to Sally being so bold as to go after what she wants and actually push him down onto her bed and run her hands all over him while kissing him passionately.  Or she could go to hand him his tea spill it on his shirt and while helping him take it off they share a kiss that turns to a day of slow sweet lovemaking.

In whatever way you convey attraction it needs to feel real and perhaps even intense. It needs to be something the reader comes away from and goes “wow.” Something they remember well because you express it in  a way that makes your reader connect, bond or long to be that character. I hope that I was able to show more than  one convincing way to write attraction that gives other writers a method to work from and hopefully some helpful tips.


Rebecca Conrad

my tears never meant a thing except something to make you angry unless i would shut up and hold every feeling in
bind my feelings til i wanna scream and beat my head into a wall
you judge and push until i’m backed into a corner…caged in my own pain
you thrive on being mean and cruel to me as if i’m nothing

i am nothing
my dreams swallowed and gone
my heart dying and never will be the same
months and years have gone by because others are selfish

forced to bottle up my anger and pain until i wanna die
forced to do everything ass backwards to how i want to
my feelings lost my hopes drownt
there is nothing left of me